Not good for each other

U and I are hanging out alot.

We are both relatively new in our jobs with facing similar frustrations, feeling inadequate despite trying our best and more or less face the same challenges and stress. Our confidence has simultaneously taken a beating and are lugging our frustrations while trying hard to remain composed (and failing in most cases). We turn to each other as we obviously can understand each other’s frustrations.

However, as I told C, we are not good for each other as we are both depressed about out jobs. Moodiness breeds moodiness. It is a vicious cycle. It is ever so convenient to pick up the phone and call yr friend who can understand how you feel by virtue of being in the same circumstances. Especially when you feel like you are ready to explode if you do not let off steam. But really, we need to stop bitching about our jobs.

For my part, I am learning to let go. I am taking the attitude that things will screw up anyway, so it is really no big deal. I just do what I can. In fact, I expect to screw up. Not sure if this is a good thing. I no longer try as hard as I used to cos I have decided that I work to live not live to work. I do what I can and if it is not enough then no point in forcing.

Btw, some ex-colleagues volunteered to come down and have lunch next week. Nice gesture initiated by uncle T. Touched. And D is coming down to meet me for lunch on wed. Looking forward to seeing all of them.

P.S. I am happy to be sick today cos this means I skip one session of screaming from the  ”screaming mama”. Last week, I was finally provoked enough to tell her to stop screaming at me everytime she cannot have things her way. I decided I am sick of having her step all over me. It is high time to be more assertive when handling her.