Why it is that when I finally feel like you are really gone from my life,
Realistically, emotionally and literally,
You just have to come right back in.
Maybe it is life’s little test for me to evaluate if I am really over you?
Am I ready to be friend again?
All I can say is I do value the friendship from the past but I really don’t know…
Frankly, it is easier to just let things be and keep it as a closed chapter of my life.
Can you just try to understand why I am keeping the distance?
Extract from past post.
“I want to know what kind of feelings I revoke in you on the rare occasions if you do think of me. Are they good or bad? Because, I care. I care what you think of me.
I really really want to know if you truly believe that I am cold and uncaring or you understood that I was just staying away because I was hurt. Can you understand that I was being stubborn and prideful?
I wanted so much to pick up the phone and call you but I was afriad. Afriad that whatever progress that I have made to move away from you will be demolised in a matter of seconds upon seeing you again. I am scared to face you to hear you talk about the someone by your side now. I am afriad the green-eyed monster in me may strike and I will drown further in misery.
Pride is not what is keeping me away. Self preservation is.”
I don’t know how hard it is for a man to understand all this. But, I have to give you credit for trying to retain the friendship. Well, who knows? Maybe this time, the friendship can be re-ignite and all the other feelings have evaporated.